How to Manifest the Life Of Your Dreams …. and Why Using Affirmations, Goal Setting and Vision Boards Doesn’t Always Work
You may already be familiar with the Law of Attraction that states: What we focus on, on the inside, we create on the outside, or … We create our reality with our thoughts.
Millions of people are using affirmations, vision boards and goal setting for applying the Law of Attraction to create a desired outcome, for love, success, health or any life goal. Proper use of these practices can catalyse wonderful positive changes in your life because, when you change your thoughts, you change your life.
But many people have found that they can state affirmations until they are blue in the face – and still have very little money in the bank, love, success and happiness!
I understand your frustration. I’ve been there. As a hypnotherapist, intuitive career coach, EFT practitioner, and life coach, for many years, I have tried virtually every personal growth technique under the sun for creating positive change. I now know what works and what doesn’t.
What many Law of Attraction experts recommend saying Affirmations and doing Vision Boards … these are excellent mediums and I tell my clients to do these as well ….. , and with affirmations, most people simply think, read or state them, over and over. But the problem is …. any change you manage to create just does not last: Just trying to force yourself through willpower alone is not very effective, because it will eventually fizzles out. And, if you are just trying to create change this way, it’s a lot of work! This is the very same reason why most dieters gain back all the weight they lost (and then some) within 2 years, why most people cannot quit smoking easily.
Just setting New Year’s resolutions and affirming at the conscious level is not enough.
You may experience occasional progress, but it’s one step forward, one or two steps back and you keep slipping back into your old pattern again, despite your efforts.
Maybe some of what you are intending, visualizing and affirming is showing up. However, the changes are not showing up quite fast or as completely as you’d like.
You still wonder: Why is this taking so long? And why do I sometimes attract something, only to lose it again? Sometimes you feel, “I am prosperous. I can attract and receive wealth.” Or “My perfect soul mate is on the way.” But you still find yourself sometimes resonating with and feeling positive about these statements and images and feelings, but most of the time doubting them.
You affirm and visualize but then slip back and think: “Yeah, right. What about all those bills?” or “I seem to keep attracting the wrong kinds of partners. I’m better off being alone.”
You are still struggling, trying to make yourself believe it. But it just doesn’t feel real.
For example, one of my clients, Lisa, was struggling with trying to manifest more money yet still kept experiencing fear, lack and struggle. While she was affirming, “I earn $10 000 every month with ease and grace” over and over, part of her still did not believe this was true. Subconsciously she was running several common limiting beliefs about money that will keep her in debt and struggling forever until they are totally released and transformed. Even worse, a deeper part did not even believe she deserved it, so no matter how many affirmations she said, the money did not show up. Her unconscious program was still running: “I’m never going to be wealthy,” and “I always run out of money, there is never enough.”
Then there was Glenys who kept affirming “I am with my Soul mate’ … the problem was, she was running deep limiting beliefs that told her … ‘I am destined to be alone’, ‘Men hurt me’ and “I’m not good enough” … with beliefs like that, Glenys will never find deep, lasting love until she releases these beliefs.
So how can you raise yourself up, so your belief is strong and consistent?
- Involve as much of yourself as you can while stating your affirmation. This is done by really engaging your imagination, seeing your desire, hearing it, touching it and focusing on really living it as your 100% truth. Creative visualization is a powerful key. Thus, in addition to simply thinking, reading and saying your positive thoughts, you are involving more of yourself by singing them, dancing them, writing them, creating Vision Boards and so on. You need to see it, hear it, touch it, and really resonate with your affirmation as a total truth.
2. Focus on the feeling of joy your desire brings you. It’s absolutely essential to feel the associated positive emotion because this raises your energetic vibration so you are attuned with your desire and helps attract it to you. Affirming from the energy of abundance and happiness effectively magnetizes your desire to you, whereas if you are feeling frustrated, fearful and impatient, this repels your desire out of neediness and lack. The feelings of Joy and Love magnetically attract your heart’s desire to you.
3. Be Grateful! Appreciate and Enjoy what is here right now. Look around you! Your life is BRIMMING WITH BLESSINGS. Give thanks to your Creator. “If the only prayer you ever say is ‘Thank you,’ it will be enough.” – Meister Eckhart.
But here’s the problem, Even if we try to affirm and visualize, even if we try to evoke the good feelings and believe, even if we remember to give thanks, often some part deep within us does not really believe it! Deep down, in our unconscious, there is a program or tape that argues with our positive affirming and visualizing.
The biggest obstacle that people face in getting what they want in life is their failure to define what it is they really want.
The next biggest hurdle to getting what you want is your own fears and doubts.
Having a vision of a wonderful future is absolutely necessary-but it typically stirs up a set of emotional roadblocks. These come at us in the form of fears both of failing and of succeeding, and in doubts about our own worthiness for success.
For example, you may be sitting there saying or writing a dozen times, “I am abundant,” but deep down a part of you blocks you from really feeling, knowing and attracting this as your truth, because that part is thinking, “No, I’m not. Money seems to go right through my hands. I have so much debt and I have piles of bills I can’t pay.” So really, you are not getting anywhere, except frustrated
So even though you are doing everything to ‘Affirm and Believe’ in the abundance, love, happiness and success you know you deserve, you may still get in our own way and SUBCONSCIOUSLY SABOTAGE your efforts.
This is because your consciousness is like an iceberg. We are aware of about 5% of our thoughts, and the other 95% are operating “below the surface.”
Imagine an Iceberg … If the tip of the iceberg wants to go North, and the huge mass below the water line is heading South, which way do you think that iceberg is going to move? You can try to push that tip as hard as you can, yet until most of that submerged power is moving the way you want it to go, you are going to be stuck or heading the wrong way.The fears and doubts cluster around a few kinds of issues. All of them are false conclusions from past experiences that limit our future. And all are hooked to beliefs about ourselves-that we don’t deserve love and success and a wonderful future, that we are not good enough, that we do not have the power to create the solutions to our problems-or beliefs about the nature of the world-that life really requires struggling and even suffering. We fear that we can’t really get what we want, that we will fail at losing weight because it has proved too difficult in the past, or we come from a generation of overweight women, or that we’ll never figure out how to get where we want to go.
We have been taught by society, our parents, our religions, and even by the movies we watch, that life is a struggle, and as long as that is what we believe, that is what we will get.
As Henry Ford said, “Whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you are right.”
Often we run these patterns unconsciously and have no idea why we seem to have our own “Sabotage Button” which we stamp on with huge force from a great height just as we start to be successful at something.
It’s imperative to look at the roadblocks as a friend, If you will follow those feelings to the core belief below the surface, and then change that belief, your whole life can open up. All emotions serve a positive purpose; They exist to help us move forward in life, They are your very best friends, trying to call your attention to the beliefs that are holding you back.
When you are 100% LINED UP inside, your outer reality must reflect this and when it is in alignment wonderful things happen … and it happens so quickly, consistently and often more miraculously and magnificently than you could even ask for or imagine.
So how do you get into this state of absolute knowingness, belief and deserving so you can Unlock the Doors to the Life of Your Dreams?
First, we need to reprogram any negative or limiting beliefs, which may be due to life experiences, particularly from childhood and early adulthood. We need to identify and then replace those negative beliefs with Higher Truths that are our absolute knowingness from our Higher Self.
This is far more powerful than just an affirmation, or even the traditional hypnotic “suggestion.” You are healing the old belief at the level of the subconscious, the root cause, and installing the highest, positive empowerment statement, deeply and completely so it aligns you with success from the inside out.
What are Limiting Beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are the culprits that hold you back from success, happiness and from your true potential. They are those sneaky thoughts that show up every time you feel inspired or motivated to go after your dreams, and they remind you of the fact that you are not good enough. They’re like the barb-wire fence and solid steel bars that are keeping you in your prison cell.
You know what it’s like, that voice pops into your head and tells you that you’re not going to make it, or you’re not going to succeed. You try to avoid it and go ahead anyway, only to fail. And then you make your limiting belief stronger, because you now believe that you’re not going to succeed.
•trick you into not trying.
•blinds you to the realities of the world.
•stops you from taking risks.
•keeps you where you are.
•obstructs your growth.
•keeps you repeating negative patterns.
•prevents you from taking responsibility for your life.
•prevents you from going after your dreams.
•gives you an excuse for not doing what you really want to do.
•fills you with doubt and fear.
•prompts you to find “evidence” to support it.
•stops you from imagining the possibilities.
•makes you feel negative and discontent.
Here’s the truth: Beliefs are not facts. But they are just as powerful. Regardless of whether or not they are true, beliefs shape reality.
How do we form these beliefs?
Beliefs are primary components and building blocks of reality. They are formed during childhood and at other key times in your life. They can be shaped and influenced by family, peers, society, media, and so forth and there may be a great many you are not even conscious of.
Your beliefs affect your thoughts, feelings, attitudes and actions, and literally shape and dictate your reality at a very fundamental level, and as such become self-fulfilling prophesies, becoming our reality whether we like it or not.
Beliefs also strongly affect your ability to attract or become attracted to people and certain situations. What is important here are the results or outcomes your beliefs create for you. For example, if you believe it’s difficult to make money, your mind will engage “special filters” so you only see, hear and experience situations where it is difficult to create money.
The mind is this powerful, that your mind will sort for all the evidence to prove the belief right. It is important to know here if you carry the right belief you attract positive outcomes, but carry limiting beliefs and you’ll prove yourself right ever time.
Why is it important to explore your beliefs?
If you change your beliefs, you change your destiny.
To successfully manifest the life you desire it is essential that your beliefs are congruent with the outcomes you seek
“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your action become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”
Get to the Core of your Limiting Beliefs
You want to identify the most fundamental limiting beliefs you hold around your goal as these are the ones that will be most pivotal in producing change and have the most transformational impact towards in generating the success you seek.
When we release these beliefs, other beliefs surrounding them may lose their grip and become redundant, rather like pulling a weed out at its roots so the whole plant can die rather than just cutting the odd leaf.
How To Recognize Limiting Beliefs
Common Limiting Beliefs
Listen to yourself. What lies are you telling?
– I don’t have this skill.
– I’m not good at this.
– Others can do it better than me.
– I’m not experienced enough.
– I’m not smart enough.
– I’m not important enough.
– I’m too young.
– I’m too old.
– I don’t have the money.
– I don’t have the time.
– It’s just not in my genes.
– It’s too hard.
– I don’t deserve success/love/ money/happiness/to lose weight.
– I’m lazy.
– Nothing ever works out for me.
– Nobody ever notices the work I do.
– I never get what I want.
– This is just “the way it is.”
– I have no control over this.
– I have nothing to offer.
– Money doesn’t grow on trees
– It is bad to have money
– Money is the route of all evil
– It is hard to make money
– There is never enough money to go around
– Rich people are greedy
– Love hurts
– I don’t deserve love
– I am unlovable
– I am never love
Nobody wants me
– The more I love, the less I am loved
– I’m not smart enough/qualified/good enough
– It will take forever
– I can’t afford it
– I don’t have the time
– I don’t have the patience
– It’s too hard
– I’ve tried before and it hasn’t worked.
THE GOOD NEWS!
The Good News is that these beliefs and fears can easily be identified and permanently cleared just as easily. It is our own choice whether we hang on to these limiting beliefs, or whether we are willing to let go of them and move forward in our lives.
So to uncover your negative beliefs you have to pay attention to your daily thoughts and if some thought is negative, ask yourself why you think in such a negative way. This will uncover your belief.
Try to also remember what your parents used to say to you in the areas that you are struggling with. If, for example, you have difficulties with money, maybe your parents used to say phrases such as Money is hard to earn, Money doesn’t grow on trees or I cannot afford this
If you find yourself repeating some kind of phrase all the time, you should realise that it’s a belief that you have. If the belief is positive, for example, you keep repeating how lucky you are, you should not touch it because it serves you. However, if you find yourself repeating disempowering or negative statements such as I am a loser, you should change such belief.
You should also understand that your every opinion and the way you see the world is so because of your beliefs. If you don’t like something, it means you have some kind of limiting belief about that thing. If you find something depressing, this is so because of your beliefs.
Some of the beliefs are hard to discover because they were formed at a very young age. Some of your beliefs were taken from your parents and they no longer serve you, however they keep filtering your experiences their own way because you fail to notice and eliminate them.
No matter how long you had some belief for, you can always eliminate it because your active beliefs are in your conscious mind. They can be hidden under so looking innocent thoughts (for example, “Look at him in his fancy car” is a hidden belief about money.
You can notice your own negative beliefs when you catch yourself saying things such as:
“Life is …”
“I am a … person”
“Earning money is …”
“I cannot do this because …”
1. Think of a goal, desire, dream or intention you have. A change you want to make, something you’d like to be, do or have. Write it down.
2. Allow thoughts, emotions, physical reactions to happen. Notice them. Complete these sentences:
It won’t be safe to ________ (fill in your goal) because . . .
I can’t ___________ (your goal) because . . .
My dream is impossible because . . .
This won’t happen because . . .
Begin looking for evidence of limiting beliefs in your life.
1. What are you critical about in others? This indicates a belief in the form of “People should . . .” or “People shouldn’t . . .” or “It’s wrong to . . .”
2. Are there things you’d like to be, do or have, but believe you can’t. Your belief will be something like, “I could never. . .” or “I’m too _____ to . . .” or “It’s not possible for me to _____ because . . .”
3. Write down what you discover.
When identifying limiting beliefs, look for statements that have meaning and significance to you, that elicit an emotional response or have impact in some way.
Take time to examine your thoughts and feelings for they are indicative of beliefs you hold.
What recurring thoughts and feelings do you experience?
What do you keep telling yourself about life, yourself or others in relation to your goal?
Perhaps you hear yourself thinking or saying the same phrases, comments or statements your parents used to make when you were young. So, what are some of the limiting beliefs you have heard growing up and what do you believe about yourself, money, time, relationships, success? They usually start with “I can’t, I have to, I don’t have, I’m not, I was meant to have etc…
Write it down…Be as open and as brutally honest with yourself, as this will unlock what’s possibly holding you back…
This week, STOP and notice the things you tell yourself.
What are you telling yourself you can’t do in your life, your business, your finances, etc.?
Be courageous and give yourself the gift of TRUTH.
Truth has the ability to heal and FREE us from what holds us back in life. Truth gives us access to choices. Truth gives us access to possibility!
It may take some time to uncover your beliefs, and you may need some help from a coach, (visit www.savvyinspiredwomen.com for more information on coaching) but the quality of your life depends on it. Spend some time now uncovering and eliminating them and you will improve your life enormously.
Whether you want to believe this or not, we all have the capacity to be extraordinary, to live our passion, to realize our full potential. When you get right down to it, what holds us back are limiting beliefs that run through our minds. These are mental habits repeating in an endless loop, making us believe that we are incapable and that our dreams are impossible to achieve. They trick us into thinking we are less than we actually are.
For many of us stirring up old beliefs that are no longer serving us, stirs up old emotions around things, people and circumstances – that have gone unresolved. It’s bringing our attention to the power of “letting go” – of old ways of thinking and being – and moving on in a very different way than we ever have before.
Whether it’s our money beliefs, old relationship patterns or our feelings around worthiness, it’s time to release any energies, any circumstances, any old ways of being that are not aligned with our life purpose. It’s time to take a closer look at our life’s journey to understand the path that has led us to where we are today – and learning how to build upon that, while releasing what is no longer working.
As a Life Purpose Intuitive, it’s my intention to help you release the limiting beliefs and old stories that are no longer serving you , so you can connect the dots of your life story in a way that makes sense, in a way that feels right. It’s my intention to help you “Connect with your Divine Purpose. Step into your Life Story and Create a Life of Passion and Abundance.”
We all have a life purpose.. What’s yours?
If you realize you could use help breaking through this barrier, what are you telling yourself about this? Would you say “yes” and take the first step to setting yourself free, or say “I can’t because…”?
If you’re ready to step fully into everything you want for yourself, in any area of life, reach out. Let’s talk. I can assist you with accelerating this breakthrough so it’s a whole lot more fun and rewarding in the process.
My Coaching programs or my Workshop, Get Unstuck and Design Your Life contains some of the most effective exercises I have found to do just that. visit www.savvyinspiredwomen.com for more information on workshops and coaching xx
Kisses Kim xxx